Happy Halloween 2008

We went to our friend's neighborhood Trick or Treating tonight with Spencer. She lives in a very nice subdivision in Duncan and she had wanted to see Spencer. He really doesn't care for Halloween, but this year he loved walking up to the houses and .........yes, you guessed it, walking right on in just like he knew them! It was so funny and all the people were very nice and understood. I'm not sure where this came from but I have a hunch it is from when we go around to new subs and go into houses and look around. He is so funny because what he is looking for is not something that most people are looking for. For a long while now he has had a facination with heating vents that are in the floor. The one thing is that ours are not, they are in the ceilings. At my friend's house he went from room to room flipping on lights, looking behind doors, under windows, etc looking for them. Then he would take his foot and slide it up to it to see if he could get it up out of the floor. This is very interesting to watch, but not really sure why he does it. We had fun Trick or Treating and each year he is liking it more!

The other pic is of Spencer's new trampoline compliments of his cousin Samantha who was tired of it. He loves it, but doesn't like it when Daddy is on there bouncing him everywhere. This will be a great activity for him and help build his balance and increase his brain activity like horse back riding did.

More Speech

I have always been concerned with Spencer speech and if he'll ever talk. I still don't know 'cause even at 7 he still doesn't have any consistent words. So I began looking for someone to add more speech other than what he gets @ school. Today we did our 2nd session with her and I've heard so many more sounds from him in these last 2 weeks! Thank God for people who have a heart and want my child to succeed in his abilities! Hopefully this is what we need to push us over the top with our speech. Thank you for helping Spencer out!!

She's growing up!

This post is about my great-neice Samantha. Last night she had her orchestra concert, she plays the cello. She had to have a black formal and I never thought she'd do it, being the athlete she is but wow....I'm so proud of her! She is growing into such a nice young lady and mature and stands up for what she believes! I am very happy for her and all of her accomplishments.....

Yesterday Mike went with Spencer's class to Niven's Apple Farm. They did a hay ride throught the orchards, picked out a pumpkin and got a small bag of apples. Ms. Neely took a great pic of Spencer and Daddy on the hay ride. He loves field trips!

Drained

On Monday I did my prep for my colonoscopy so I went to sleep early without posting. No excuse just tired. So here I sit in the dr office getting ready to go back for the procedure UGH!!!!

Where has it went

Can you believe this is the last week in October? I was driving to Hendersville today to visit my neices and wow how pretty the leaves are traveling up Hwy 25. I was thinking, my goodness, where has this month gone. Next Sat is Nov 1 and before you know it we'll be doing the Christmas Holidays, then end of 1st semester and then spring break and the cycle continues. It seems the older I get the more time seems to just FLY by! Went I was in my teens I never thought the end of school and graduation would ever get here. I long for the days when time seemed to be slower and a slower pace of life with it. Next weekend we change our clocks back and this seems to help because we slow ourselves down, or at least I do once the darkness falls outside......who knows, maybe my new bedtime will be 9pm!!! Yea right! Time with Spencer flies also. When he was born, I was a mess. Scared to death he was going to die, he wouldn't eat, his heart, etc. Now 7 years later I look back to those times and wish they hadn't went by so fast! Enjoy them when they are little, those days don't last forever!

The fall pic is in WV on a lake as a kid we used to camp on and fish.....awesome pic!

"Oh What a Night"

That's what I'm sayin' right now! Tonight we went to the Dorman vs. Brynes football game. I'm a high school and college football junkie! I've been @ 2 high school teaching since coming to SC and both schools are big about their football. I was @ Spartanburg High School 6 years, then I'm starting my 4th year @ Dorman. Tonight the Cavaliers beat the Brynes Rebels 35-28. It was amazing! I'm so proud of the coaches and the jobs they have done with those young men and the example they set for them. Most all of them are good christain coaches that lead not only on the field but off the field also. Go Cavs!

Friday nights!

I can remember a few years ago that staying home on a Friday night was a sin! Now, I love it! Can't wait for Friday when I get home and put the lounging pants on, a big t-shirt and lately my WV slippers that anytime I'm cold a few minutes with these on and I'm real cozy! Now, Friday night are about spending quality family time together, playing games, watching a kid friendly movie, letting Spencer stay up later or just sitting on the couch covered up with Spencer cuddling. That give me warm fuzzies deep in my tummy! I love when he sits with me and cuddles and then he'll turn around and give me a kiss and even though he can't verbalize, he says with his eyes, "I love you Mommie!" EWWWWWW.....cold chills just thinking about it, gotta go and get some more cuddle time!!!

Thursday

Today has so far been a good day except I am so tired! Spencer was up last night for 3 hours wide awake. Mike was up with him and stayed but I couldn't sleep until I made sure he had went back to sleep. Then this morning I was so tired and felt so sick. I'm better now and Spencer slept till 9am. We're seeing his old speech pathologist from McCarthy. She wants to continue seeing Spencer to help get his speech on track.

Tonight is football night, West Virginia plays Auburn on ESPN. I hope WV shows up. They are playing in WV and I hope the fans will support the team! Go Mountaineers!!

Till tomorrow.......

So Sleepy

I'm not sure what is up, but I can't even sit down on the couch or chair at night anymore without going to sleep. Then I wake up and it's freaky 3:3o, I'm freezing and drag myself into bed to get warm after I've had a terrible time standing up and walking........don't know if I'm not resting or if something else is going on or I'm just plain tired! Anyway.....I like sleep.....good night!

TWO TIMES

Ok, since I didn't blog yesterday and I tried to amend this am, I'm going to post tonight for today?! Today was a good day! Spencer is doing better in school, attending more, trying hard and all around cooperating unlike the first month of school. I guess he just needed to adjust to another school year. I picked him up from the YMCA and took him for his flu mist. He was such a big boy. Didn't want to go in because last time he and his daddy were there, they took blood and they had no idea how to take it on him....But once I convinced him we were just getting a squirt in our nose, he did great. He's used to being sprayed in the nose because I squirt Saline spray in at night and in the morning to help keep the allergy nasties out! So he just thought he was getting a spray of saline. I was proud of him! He is growing into quite the amazing little guy! I'm always proud of you Spencer and I love you!

OH NO!

In my sleepiness last night, I didn't BLOG!! I feel so guilty, but ok now I'm doing it for yesterday. I went out last night to cover my Sago Palms to protect them from the frost that may have come, but didn't, and on my way back in I was thinking about what to blog about. I had nothing really to say except it was a good day, considering it was a Monday. Everyone had a good day with the exception of Mike. He started feeling weird in his stomach Sunday evening and yesterday came home from work and went to bed. He still felt bad. He got up and ate some soup and said it was still there, but thought soup may help. He seems down in the dumps lately, but again this time of year is hard. Sometimes it's way back in our mind and we're not even conscious of it. The grief comes out in ways that effect the way we feel. Keep us all in your thoughts, we will get through this, it just takes time!

Two Things

Today was another busy day, not stressful, just busy. Spencer and I stayed home from church just because and it's hard to get out on a cool Sunday morning. Mike went because he plays the drums in the Praise Team. Mike cooked lunch while I was cleaning up the clothes, folding and putting them away. Since the washer has been fixed, I'm finally seeing the bottom of all the piles! When I walked through the hall I notice a sharpie pen laying in the floor with the cap gone. First I thought, how the heck did that get in here, I didn't have it in here?" Then it dawned on me, SPENCER! When I brought the pen in the kitchen I asked Spencer where the lid was and he just looked at me. Mike told me not to growl at him for doing that and believe me I WASN'T even thinking about scalding him in fact I was proud! My little guy got into my pens in a glass on my buffet and got a sharpie and took the lid off and proceeded to do what all little kids do....WRITE ON THINGS! Well I searched and could find nothing as to what he had wrote on. I was so happy but wanted to find where he had left his marks. Tonight after his shower, I always put him on his bed to lotion him up and put his jammies on. Low and behold there on his sheets were all kinds of SCRIBBLES!! I started to cry and yelled at Mike that I had found the marks. I was so excited, I didn't care about all the think blacks lines on the pillow case and flat sheet, no all I cared about was my son had taken the initiative to take a pen and make marks. This may sound absolutely crazy, but until you know what it's like to wait on accomplishments you'll never know how happy this made me. But for those of you that share the waiting on your child to hit that developmental milestone, you know what I'm talking about. I am a proud Mommie right now!

The second thing I want to share is the Walk to Remember that we attend every year at the Greenville Hospital off of Church Street. We have been attending this for 8 years now and it is important to us to take this one day to remember our daughter in a formal way. Madelyn would have been 9 years on Nov. 29 and 8 years ago we met a great group of people from the Resolve through Sharing Bereavement Program at the hospital. The lady, Danny, that held our support groups, became a close friend and she will always be close to our hearts. This year for some reason, it was harder to attend this service than it had been in the past. There is not a day that goes by that we don't think about Madelyn and how her short life has made me a better person. Losing our child is something that will never go out of our minds, we will experience it the rest of our life. Please don't feel sorry for us, but pray for us that God will give us strength to get through the rough times and faith that someday we will be with our little angel in heaven. The picture of hands is when the ribbons are tied on the Tree of Life in the Memorial Garden at the hospital.

Great Day!

WOW, usually a busy day makes me crazy, but today was different. I don't know if it's because I was off yesterday from school and I got alot done and didn't have to rush around to get things done today, but I had a great day. Mike had to work so he was up and gone by 4:30am. I found Spencer asleep in the kitchen floor when Mike got up so he put him in bed with me. We slept until 7:30am and then watch Disney, ate breakfast and spent the morning washing clothes, picking up and general things. Along with those I decorated the cake for Archie and Ryan's birthday party. I wanted it to be perfect for those 2 special little guys whose families are like my own and I consider them to be like my family! Things went great with the cake and it turned out beautiful and everyone loved it! The party was so much fun and Spencer enjoyed it....I was scared he would get over stimulated, but he didn't. In fact he found a new friend and kinda followed her around, Archie's Nana. I think she reminds Spencer of his Mamaw who he misses alot. It's good to connect with people who remind you of loved ones who live far. The party was great and Spencer joined in just like circle time at school when the books were read. We left there and went to my friend's house for game night. It was a blast and we laughed alot. What a fun day and what great friends we have here in Greenville, SC. Thanks to all of you for letting us enjoy you, your families and your friends!

Structure

OK, I'm the first to admit that I like structure in my life.....maybe I have adult ADHD?! It really isn't funny, but today was truly a messed up day.....got up @ 5am, got ready and Spencer was up by 6am. Got him on the bus @ 7:20 and I headed to Dorman. Getting into the car I heard my phone in the house ringing and I didn't answer it, thought who the heck is calling. Ended up being one of my assistance to tell me not to go to school, that we were canceled. On my way to Dorman I listen to WORD radio and just past Reidville Rd they said Dorman High was closed today because of a chemical leak at a nearby plant. I called one of the coaches I knew and he said yes we were closed and not to go to the school because they wouldn't let you on campus. By this time I'm @ 290/221 so I U turn back up 290 to the house really upset. I admit I love the thought of having the day off, but after I had got up, got ready and almost made it to school found out school was canceled and headed back up the road, I got this weird feeling like this isn't right, I'm suppose to be at school. It was really hard for my mind to make the switch, to change things that I had already started and I have to say I got scared, like maybe I hadn't heard right and I should be at school. It's strange that sometimes the mind can be so powerful that you have to really stop and think about things and make sure you go over and over what is happening and convince yourself it is the right thing to do and you did hear right.

Not sure any of this makes sense, but structure I need and not just me, but Spencer likes structure also. Not just him but my students, who I worried about, need structure and alot of their peers need structure and other teachers need structure and some of my friends need structure. I think structure makes us secure in our daily living and that is why we like it and hate to have things changed. So if I'm having a bad day, it is usually that something just isn't quite right with my routine and the same holds true for Spencer. Some structure is a good thing as long as it doesn't dominate your life!

Simple Life

I'm not sure why the older I get, the harder it seems to be simple. Something always seems to be throwing me into a turmoil where I lose my cool either at work or here at home. But when I'm with Spencer and we're home in the evening sitting on the couch watching Spongebob after supper and his bath, me massaging his hands and feet and just breathing him in, life seems so simple, so relaxed that I wish we could stay like this all day and night. Just enjoying him, not really pushing him to do something he doesn't want to, not trying to "fix" him, or, make him say sounds he can't or make him play something he doesn't want to. I enjoy this time, me and him. I get "warm fuzzies" deep down in my tummy because I know my little man will always help Mommie enjoy the simple life!

Forgot to add......

Pregnancy and Infant Loss Day

Today is the day that is hard! It is a day of remembering and honoring our little ones that have passed. So tonight @ 7pm I will light a candle in memory of our sweet little girl, Madelyn Jane. She taught me so much in a short time and prepared me for Spencer's Down Syndrome. Thank you sweet baby girl, Rest In Peace!

Healthy Eating

OK, since losing 140 lbs, I really try to eat healthy, thus pass it on to Spencer, let's face it Mike is a grown boy and does what he wants! But Spencer is a little chunky and has the potential of becoming overweight! I don't want that mainly because of his heart and health issues. I want him to love active time, running, playing, swimming....etc. He loves activities, but let's face it, he's a kid when it comes to eating. I remember saying I'd never take my kid through McD's drive thru, well guess what, I do.....every time we pass by a McD, Jack in the Box, Chick Fil A, or any other place Spencer has had chicken nuggets before, he breaks his neck watching it pass by and then whines this little whimper to let me know he's not happy. Well, today in my persuit of healthy eating, I packed Spencer some carrot sticks with ranch dressing to dip them in. The note from school read "Spencer is quite a smart little boy. Today at lunch he put his carrot sticks in his milk carton to make us think he had ate them all. He sure keeps us on our toes!" What a smart fellow, hide them and they will think I've ate them! He is to cute and amazing! Just like any little boy, hates his vegetables! Don't worry son, you'll grow to love them!

"He's the child............."

WOW, just finished at lunch reading Roadmap to Holland. What a great way she has shared so many of the same feelings I had. This read was great therapy for me at a time when I needed some therapy! I remember that day when the genetic counselor confirmed that Spencer has Down Syndrome. I couldn't hardly breathe, it hurt so bad. Mostly it hurt because I was afraid he was going to die, just like Madelyn. Now 7 years and some odd months later, can't remember it. Not that I want that feeling back, but what it actually felt like. That hurt, not knowing, not understanding and not knowing what I was suppose to do! Now, what to do just happens. Just be Mommie and everything else will fall into place. I remember his teacher at the Meyer Center, Ms. "Didi" told me "don't worry, you do the Mommie things and let us teachers do the rest." She was such a great teacher for Spencer and me.

Today when I finished the book, the last 2 sentences said it all "He's the child I wanted, that I did not know I wanted. He is my son."

Relaxing Sunday Evening

Today has been the best day in a while! Spencer and I actually went to early service this morning. We didn't stay for Sunday School as Spencer doesn't really fit in the 1st grade room. He's not a sit down, color, cut, paste or listen to a story kid. During worship though, he was awesome! He sat and didn't make to many noises. He loves the music and today they had the handbells that he really loves. Elmo went also and sat in a chair beside of Spencer. I could sit and watch him for hours at times when he is interacting with his stuffed toys. They sent home play and speech targets and really he is doing those already. Maybe not in a real structured setting but he knows these things like Elmo, bowl, spoon, cup, drink, eat, blanket, sleep.......and he does 2-step directions good. Sometimes it takes him a while to focus on what I am acting, he's usually "into" a movie or computer game. When I'm taking to him and he's ignoring me, I ask Mike do you think he can't hear me or is he ignoring me? Neither of us can answer that, but I know once I get his attention he goes and does what I ask.

Today, a day that was relaxing. Watching Spencer play with Bubbles, at church, eating and interacting with his toys. I love days like this!

Projects

OK, I admit, it was a long, hard week. Today when I woke by the noise of Spencer on the laptop watching the Wiggles, I thought "oh no", already! So I got up and kissed him good morning, with little reaction from him. We went to the potty, I fixed his milk and then laid back down on the couch. That didn't last long as my mind raced with all the things that need done. The problem with this is I can't get one job finished before I begin another one. I have so many things that rush around in my head that I can't get organized. So today, I just did NOTHING!! Yes you read right, NOTHING! Oh I picked up a little, Spencer & I worked on his speech goals and play targets for the week with Elmo, filled the bird feeders, trimmed some bushes that were growing over our fence, killed some fireant mounds, tried to help Mike with the pool, washed a couple loads of clothes at our neighbor's house since ours is on the outs, cooked dinner, swept the kitchen, loaded the dishwaser, ok, ok, I did do something but much less than I normally do! But you know, it felt good to just kinda wonder around and leisurely do what I felt only needed done. I don't do this often, but once in a great while it's nice!

The projects that are still not completed? Well they will still be waiting on me when I get to them and hopefully I can organize in my mind my next day off! Happy Saturday to you!

Greenville Children's Hospital Radiothon

I listen to WORD Radio on the way to school in the morning and today they were having a Radiothon for Greenville Memorial Hospital's Children Hospital. When I was listening to the couple of stories from parents who had experienced the Children's Hospital, I began thinking back to when we spent time there. In 1999 when Madelyn was born we spent 5 days in the old NICU. Now they have a great new NICU that we haven't seen, but hear it's great. When Spencer was born we spent 3 weeks in NICU, still the old one. Shortly after we came home, Spencer spiked a fever of 104 under the arm. I was such a nervous wreck I called 911 because I thought it was his heart. They refused to take us to GHS Children's Hospital, we live on the line of Spartanburg/Greenville, but are actually Spartanburg County. I asked the EMTs to leave so I could drive my son to the hospital that knows how to care for him. They did and we drove off to the hospital. We ended up having a UTI, he wasn't circumcised yet and this led to the UTI. We spent Labor weekend 2001 in the Children's Hospital. Since then we've been back for outpatient procedures.

What a great place, great doctors, great nurses, great staff and great support. They were so caring and understanding! Mike and I have the utmost respect for the Children's Hospital and GHS in general. Thank you for taking care of our little guy and supporting us and helping us in our stays at the hospital. We are lucky to have such a great resource here in the Upstate.

Reaction?!

I often think back this time of year to a time that seems oh so long ago....the Fall of 1999 when Mike and I were expecting our first child. A little girl whom we named Madelyn Jane. At the end of June 1999, I went in for the "normal" 16-18 week ultrasound. Mike had just started a new job that was in Charlotte, but opening an office in Greenville by September. I was packed and ready to leave for WV with Samantha and our dog at that time, Willow. As I laid on the table of the ob/gyn and watched as the tech did her thing, I noticed it was taking a long time. I had to have ultrasounds before because of some abnormal bleeding and they didn't take this long. I told her "come on now, I'm on my way out of here to WV to visit...." She said I need to get the dr to let him look at a couple things. Well that automatically sent red flags up for me everywhere. When I questioned this, she said she thought she seem some signs of a possible chromosomal abnormalities. I said ok like what, I'm a special needs teacher and I want to know now. She made me wait for the dr and he said that they seen what looked like Madelyn had no diaphram and the thickening at the back of the neck and "white spots" on the stomach. I lost it, tried to get in touch with Mike. He was doing sales that day in Greenville. It seemed like forever I sat there by myself, no one to call, no one to talk to, nurses looking at me like I was from Mars, just a real "I'm all by myself feeling". Mike showed up finally and the dr took us in his office and offered up his thoughts abd suggestions. One of the things he told us was abortion and we could try again later. Now I look back and think "oh my God", is this what they tell all parents if their babies aren't perfect at that ultrasound. No wonder the % is so high for abortions with a prenatal dx of Down Syndrome. I thought Mike was going to punch the man's lights out. He gave him a few choice words and we left. They sent me to Maternal/Fetal for further ultrasounds. We went the next day, had a level 2 and they did see some markers of some sort of chomosomal abnormality. We seen the dr and he suggest I go to WV and have a good time and relax. We decided to do the amnio. DUMB MOVE! It hurt like hell!!! The only reason I wanted it done was to know exactly what sort of diability we would be dealing with, that's the special eduator coming out again! We did the amnio and when the results came back we went in to meet with a genetic counselor. I'll never forget her, she reminded me of Princess Di....very attractive and poised. She sat across from us and said, "the baby is a girl and she has Down Syndrome". Mike and I looked at each other and then back at her and I said "what type of Down Syndrome"? She got a funny look on her face and said "Trisomy 21". At that point we raised our hands in a high 5, started hugging, crying, laughing and thanking her for the news. She told us that never before in her career had she ever had a reaction quite like that one! I proceeded to tell her that we had talked and working with special needs children that have Down Syndrome, Trisomy 21 would be my disability of choice if ever I could choose. She laughed and said you guys are quite a pair and this little lady will have a great life! Unfortunately, Madelyn's life was short lived due to her unfixable heart defect. She survived 5 days in NICU. God however knew that our family could handle this dx so we got another chance 2 years later with Spencer. I remember my Dad saying the night the counselor told us Spencer had Down Syndrome, "God knows that this family is good with kids that have Down Syndrome. We have Tracy, we had Madelyn for a short time and now we get to have Spencer"! What a blessing for a family to be able to have 3 children with Down Syndrome, What a BLESSING and JOY!!

Enough!

OK, the last posts all seem like I'm bitchin' and complaining. I want to post something positive today. YES, my child has a disability! Yes that is a positive thing! Where would I be today if I had not experienced the birth of not 1 but 2 children with T21 Down Syndrome. I definitely would not be as compassionate as I am about my career as a special educator, my students and how others treat them. I definitely would not have the attitude I have, be it good or bad, depending on the mood I'm in. I definitely would not appreciate the little things in life that so many take for granted. Little things like that sound that you know by golly is a word. Yesterday evening at dinner we were watching Sponge Bob, I know bad idea, but hey it distracts from the eating of foods normally Spencer would refuse. The song they sing comes on and its has in it "wooooooooo" lives in a ....... I be gosh dang if Spencer didn't do that part, the "wooooooooo"! I 'bout came unglued laughing, crying, screaming at Mike to listen and guess what. Spencer wouldn't do it again if his life depended on it, but by golly I heard it!!! Go Spence, I knew you could. He is so stubborn sometimes I could eat him up! Sometimes he does things I know to see my reaction. Push my button until I explode and I see it in him saying, oh boy there she goes! Just the simple life, that's all Spencer wants and I guess in a way he gets it. Don't know if you've ever read it, but it is well worth the time. The title "If People with Down Syndrome Ruled the World" http://www.nads.org/pages_new/news/ruletheworld.html Take time and check it out.....how great the world would be. That's what I think about when Spencer is being difficult, how simple my world would be if he ran it!!

Monday, Monday...by the Momas & Papas

That is definitely what it has been, not quite as bad as Friday, but still Monday! We had a great weekend and Spencer enjoyed our fire in the pit on Saturday night. It was so much fun to sit and watch the stars, listen to the fire crackling and Spencer and Bubbles(the dog) side by side. It does make me homesick though. In WV we do this on a regular basis, have a fire outside, roasting weiners, making s'mores and just sittin' around talkin'. It's the simple life I miss by not living in WV. You see having a child with Down Syndrome is not new to my family. My brother has a daughter with Down Syndrome, Tracy, soon to be 30 years old on Jan 2, 2009! They are having her a BIG PARTY! She deserves it! I get homesick for family! I need family support! I need a simple life so my child can grow knowing his family loves and cares for him. It's hard for him to connect with them across the miles when he only sees them one every 3-4 months. We have lots of friends and people we love, but it's just not family. I know I can call my friends at any time and say "hey I need you". But it's not like calling Mom or Steve and saying "Hey I need you". I miss the fact that no matter how you feel, family is there and of course they always give their opinion on how you they which is hard to take sometimes!

It is good to know though, that I can always go back and they will welcome me with open arms. Someday maybe, but for now, Mike, Spencer and I make our home here in SC. It is a nice and good place, but it's not "home".

Failure!

What can I say....I could give all kinds of excuses for not blogging Fri and Sat, but that's all they are. Everytime I thought about doing it something else came to mind that needed to be done. So here I sit feeling like a failure and that's been alot lately!! I feel I've failed my son by not doing enough to help him in his achievements. Maybe to many movies, to much time on the computer by him and me, to many video games and not enough quality time spend with him and playing with him to help him get where I feel he needs to be. Then I turn a complete 360 and say you know what, I can only do so much! I'm a working mom, trying to make sure Spencer has everything he needs to reach his highest potential and that's all I can do. Guess you could say I'm having a "hormonal" moment, which those are alot these days. Tears at every little thing, every little thought and everytime I read about Down Syndrome I feel I'm on overload. WOW you'd thought at this time in my life I would have come to grips with things, but you know I don't think we as parents of children with a disability every come fully to grips with that fact. We say we do, but we all have those moments where it hits hard! My child will probably never marry, my child since he is the only child, will never be a parent, therefore I'll never be a grandparent.....This hits hard. I don't blame Spencer, it's not his fault by no means, but these thoughts often consume me and I have to step back and look at things again. I do thank GOD for my child with special needs and that we never will have to deal with the peer pressures so called typical children have to go through, I'll never have to deal with drugs and alcohol problems, never have any severe behavior issues in school, he'll always love life to the fullest I'll always be able to play "Santa" at Christmas, Easter Bunny @ Easter and I'll always be able to watch cartoons with my child.....these things are great! I do consider myself very fortunate to have a child with Down Syndrome, because out of all the disabilities, Down Syndrome to me is the one I would have chosen if given a choice.

Well enough of my venting and I hope to be able to blog everyday even though I've missed 2 days, I think I more than made up for it here!

31 for 21

OK, I missed yesterday blogging 'cause I just found out that this is the month for the blog. 31 days of blogging to raise awarness of Trisomy 21 Down Syndrome.

I guess I just write what I want.....to start Down Syndrome has been a part of my life for 30 years!! Yes and Spencer is only 7. My brother, Steve, has a daughter who was born January 2, 1979 with Down Syndrome. I was 19 at that time and in college. I remember seeing her for the 1st time and thinking she looks alot like I did when I was a baby, chubby with a round head. I remember her ears being sunk in her head because of swelling, but not realizing it at the time. It was a small town hopital in WV. They had a young lady peditrician that came around and told my sister in law, Doris, that they were sending Tracy to Charleston WV to have some tests run. No one really ever said anything else. Years later after Spencer was born, Doris told me about the night they arrived at the hospital in Charleston and a nurse from the NICU told her that Tracy was a Mongoloid. She said is was if someone had taken a hot poker and stuck it in her stomach and began turning it back and forth! What a terrible thing to say, but of course times have changed, well at least we like to think they have! I remember her bringing Tracy to Beckley WV for therapies with an Early Interventionist and me going with her....I was amazed at how flexible Tracy was in her joints and how she could spread her legs and do a "chinese split". I never once realized that this was bad for her hip joints. I remember her going to school at a special school and loving it, her friends and teachers. I remember her older brother and older sister getting into physical fights with other kids. They made fun of Tracy alot and Jason and Tammie were very protective! I remember going places with Tracy and getting odd looks from others and getting very defensive, just like I do now with Spencer. Why can't people just look and give you a nice smile, one that lets you know they are seeing something different, but no, there are always those that look like you've falling out of sky from somewhere!!

I can see how things have changed from the time Steve and Doris had Tracy to now with Spencer. People have become more aware, but we have so far to go with awareness! My goal with awareness is for all people to accept people with Down Syndrome for who they are, not what they look like and what they can or can't do. Tracy and Spencer both are special people who love life and enjoy laughing, which is something we all should do more of!!!

Buddy Walk 2008

What a great cause....walking for awarness of Down Syndrome! How many people I know that are so ignorant to what Down Syndrome is! They should have all been there at the walk to see that individuals with Down Syndrome are no different than they are, but yet of course they are different. They are happy, love to dance, sing, laugh, run, walk, play etc.....things that we "typical" people don't do enough of. This is one day I love, Buddy Walk, where I see all different people, some with Down Syndrome, others without it, but they all blend together. What a wonderful day and a huge THANK YOU to Anne and Marcy for organizing it and to the sponsors for sponsoring it and to all of those that attended in honor of someone or just because they wanted to. WHAT A GREAT DAY!

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