Reaction?!

I often think back this time of year to a time that seems oh so long ago....the Fall of 1999 when Mike and I were expecting our first child. A little girl whom we named Madelyn Jane. At the end of June 1999, I went in for the "normal" 16-18 week ultrasound. Mike had just started a new job that was in Charlotte, but opening an office in Greenville by September. I was packed and ready to leave for WV with Samantha and our dog at that time, Willow. As I laid on the table of the ob/gyn and watched as the tech did her thing, I noticed it was taking a long time. I had to have ultrasounds before because of some abnormal bleeding and they didn't take this long. I told her "come on now, I'm on my way out of here to WV to visit...." She said I need to get the dr to let him look at a couple things. Well that automatically sent red flags up for me everywhere. When I questioned this, she said she thought she seem some signs of a possible chromosomal abnormalities. I said ok like what, I'm a special needs teacher and I want to know now. She made me wait for the dr and he said that they seen what looked like Madelyn had no diaphram and the thickening at the back of the neck and "white spots" on the stomach. I lost it, tried to get in touch with Mike. He was doing sales that day in Greenville. It seemed like forever I sat there by myself, no one to call, no one to talk to, nurses looking at me like I was from Mars, just a real "I'm all by myself feeling". Mike showed up finally and the dr took us in his office and offered up his thoughts abd suggestions. One of the things he told us was abortion and we could try again later. Now I look back and think "oh my God", is this what they tell all parents if their babies aren't perfect at that ultrasound. No wonder the % is so high for abortions with a prenatal dx of Down Syndrome. I thought Mike was going to punch the man's lights out. He gave him a few choice words and we left. They sent me to Maternal/Fetal for further ultrasounds. We went the next day, had a level 2 and they did see some markers of some sort of chomosomal abnormality. We seen the dr and he suggest I go to WV and have a good time and relax. We decided to do the amnio. DUMB MOVE! It hurt like hell!!! The only reason I wanted it done was to know exactly what sort of diability we would be dealing with, that's the special eduator coming out again! We did the amnio and when the results came back we went in to meet with a genetic counselor. I'll never forget her, she reminded me of Princess Di....very attractive and poised. She sat across from us and said, "the baby is a girl and she has Down Syndrome". Mike and I looked at each other and then back at her and I said "what type of Down Syndrome"? She got a funny look on her face and said "Trisomy 21". At that point we raised our hands in a high 5, started hugging, crying, laughing and thanking her for the news. She told us that never before in her career had she ever had a reaction quite like that one! I proceeded to tell her that we had talked and working with special needs children that have Down Syndrome, Trisomy 21 would be my disability of choice if ever I could choose. She laughed and said you guys are quite a pair and this little lady will have a great life! Unfortunately, Madelyn's life was short lived due to her unfixable heart defect. She survived 5 days in NICU. God however knew that our family could handle this dx so we got another chance 2 years later with Spencer. I remember my Dad saying the night the counselor told us Spencer had Down Syndrome, "God knows that this family is good with kids that have Down Syndrome. We have Tracy, we had Madelyn for a short time and now we get to have Spencer"! What a blessing for a family to be able to have 3 children with Down Syndrome, What a BLESSING and JOY!!